Popular tweets
@GUBLERNATION
i asked a girl to prom by giving her a fancy jewelry box with the note "will you Gogh to prom with me." inside the box was a fake bloody ear
@johnsummit
drake the type of dude to fanclack at a show then get mad at u when u politely ask him to stop
@xsimpbizkitx
On my way to vote in the elevator a woman asked me if I knew who I was voting for. I said yes. She said I hope PPC. I looked at her and said I’m gay and I love abortions. Anyway it got awkward after that.
@kritinotkeerti
Tell me you have brown parents without telling me you have brown parents:
@DavidSHolz
Many of my brilliant friends are paralyzed by their intellects. Thinking overwhelms doing. Many of my successful friends are less reflective, but quick to action. They are always focused on moving forward. Making as many 'probably correct actions' as possible. A winning strategy.
@reddhotriot
once the toilet was clogged at my friend’s house and i learned that they did not have a plunger, and instead their mom would roll up her sleeves and unclog the shit with her hands
@InternetHippo
(arguing) but where do we draw the line? at the reasonable place you identified or at this much worse place that i just imagined for the sole purpose of discrediting your point?
